Wedding Vow Caveats I Expect to Hear This Summer

I do ...
... provided you delete the Bay City Rollers from your iPod list.
... except in years when the Detroit Lions win the SuperBowl.
... until you start wearing sansabelt slacks. Then all bets are off.
... assuming the statute of limitations on old, college stories is five.
... for as long as you rub my feet.
... given all Vegas weekends include me, a nice hotel, and huevos rancheros.
... as long as you don’t blog it to the world.